7 toxic behaviours you teach your children without realising it

It is only natural that every single parent wants the best for their child and wants to provide them with the best possible upbringing. But sometimes we don't realise some things ourselves, so we can unintentionally start instilling inadvertently toxic patterns of behaviour in our children. Does this happen to you?

If you stop terrified by one of the following 7 points, realising you have been making this mistake, don’t worry – no parent can be perfect and flawless while raising a child. A big step forward lies in noticing something like this in the first place and then finding out how you can work on it. 

There are 7 toxic behaviours you might teach your children without realising it

#1 Teaching a child something you don’t stick to yourself

It may not seem like it, but children are very receptive in early childhood and pay close attention to what you do. At the same time, they can react extremely sensitively if you try to teach them something that you do not do yourself. In this case, the child takes just one single example – it is not important that they keep their word. That’s why you should always try to act according to what you say. 

#2 You have exaggerated reactions

Yes, first we have to emphasise that it is totally understandable if you have a lot on your shoulders. Raising a child takes a lot of energy itself, especially if besides parenthood you have problems in the work, relationship, health, or financial areas. Everyone sometimes boils over but even that should have a certain limit. If it happens once, your child will most probably understand, and even sympathise. But if that happens regularly, they will subconsciously take an example from it, which can cause them great problems later in life. 

#3 Your household is too “cold”

We aren’t talking here about temperature, but about expressing your feelings openly. In order for a child to be able to find and maintain healthy relationships in adulthood, it is essential that they learn to express their feelings at an early age. Therefore, every child needs a caress, a kiss on the forehead or a hug, and it is great to also see such expressions of love and affection among their parents. 

#4 You are setting him a bad example in terms of healthy lifestyle

In terms of lifestyle, it is very important that a child receives the right example from an early age. One of the worst examples to set lies in having a house where the cupboard is full of junk food, you overeat at night and you often eat out at fast food restaurants. A child will learn these patterns, which can lead not only to health problems at a later age, but also to problems with self-confidence due to their shape. 

#5 When at home, we say negative things about other people

Do you like to gossip with your partner or with friends who come over for a coffee? Do you talk about neighbours or colleagues in front of your child, and is it practically the rule that you are not too flattering about them? It is a thing we do not even realise, but again, a child is very sensitive and takes an example from it. Therefore, in the presence of your child, try to speak good about others and, whenever possible, highlight their positive qualities. 

#6 Silent treatment

This is the worst thing you can do to your child. Most parents don't realise this, but the only thing you're causing your little ones to do is develop future trauma that is likely to affect almost every single relationship they enter into as an adult. Although it may be difficult for you to talk about some things openly, always explain to the child what they did wrong and why you don't like their behaviour. Instead of the silent treatment, it is always better to consider what you can do together so that such behaviour does not repeat again. 

#7 Encouraging over competitive behaviour

Do you ever compare your child with one of their classmates or a neighbour’s kid? Many parents consider this to be a common, innocent remark, but they do not realise how deeply they sow the seeds of competition and envy. It is very easy to create a situation where the child considers almost everyone as their opponent or even enemy because of this, and in life they will become an unhealthily competitive individual.